144 Hours; My Internal Landscape; and The Gift of a Sabbath

Darkness envelopes this tiny piece of land that I have landed on.  Stepping across the rear threshold of this Alaska 737 jet, my feet feel the familiar path down the steps and onto the tarmac of the Kona airport.  The day's Winter heat is still radiating up from the volcanic pavement.  Even in the darkness, everything here is vibrant, more alive.  I feel as if I have just woken up from a long, drug induced sleep. 

Morning arrives quickly, but I am in no hurry to greet her.  The scrumptious, high thread count sheets are cocooning my body and they beckon me to stay awhile longer.  The lanai door is open allowing the fragrance of plumeria to gently float into our room.  The sun is playing peek-a-boo through the slated louvers.  The sweetness of these moments do not escape me. 

I have approximately 144 hours in front of me for this sweet, much needed reprieve.  I lay here imagining that these coming hours are like a big fat catalog and I get to pick, at will, what they will hold.  My selfishness pokes it's ugly head out and makes case for only water activities; beach and pool lounging; heavy doses of HGTV; and delicious island food. We will see what happens.

Two hours have passed and I find myself comfortably reclining in the fine white sand.  A cornucopia of humanity blends together in front of me.  Languages from around the globe, dance and swirl their way into my ears.  Verigated shades of brown stroll by.  Over the years, I've developed a deep appreciation for my own healthy nut brown body.  I lay here and am suddenly aware that I am in a bubble and this is truly not how most of the world lives.  There is a whisper that floats across my consciousness and I hear that this time has an expiration date, but for now...I will savor it and hold it as my Sabbath.  

Realizing that this Sabbath is a gift, I whisper of my surrender of it and consciously decide that I will choose to embrace each moment and allow Him to orchestrate what each hour holds.  (Stay tuned for another post in a few days.) 

A Sabbath is meant as a gift from our Creator.  It is designed, by God, to provide much needed rest.  Even God took a Sabbath on the seventh day of creation. (Genesis 2:3) A sabbath can be ten minutes; two hours; an entire day, or even a week.  I think I will try to build more Sabbaths into 2016, would you consider joining me?  

Until We Chat Again,

The Plank-Eyed Girl

Unexpected Gifts, Dead Goats, and No Cancelation Possibilities

Sometimes my eyes are open, but I do not really see.  Today, I am determined to see.  Grabbing my camera, I step out of the comfortable, cozy hotel and onto cold concrete sidewalk.  Frigid air swirls around my being and dances away on the wind taking with it all the dead and dried out leaves from the previous season.  There is no mistake that this morning, Winter has made its arrival and has no intention of leaving anytime soon.

Glancing down, mid-stroll, I freeze. Like a computer generated game character, time stands still for me. One brilliant, colby colored tender leaf lays at my feet.  It is surrounded by dirt y brown, rusty, and golden dried out leaves ready to be collected and made into mulch. Not able to stop myself, my hand reaches down and scoops it up.  How did this one leaf escape death so far?   Could it be that I saw it because I purposely set out to "see" today?

I have been alive 19,119 days and I have to wonder what all I have missed because I did not really "see".  I have been blinded and lulled to sleep by bright lights; my own swirling thoughts; and the splendor of sparkly and colorful things that flash before my eyes on the screen.  Yikes!  I will never get to relive those days and all I have missed.

Can I be honest?  I often don't really "hear" either. I read the print in my leather bound book and I don't really "hear" any application to my life? Story after story of weird and even distorted events and people.  You know the stories I am speaking of... a man being swallowed by a whale and spewed out onto a beach?  Another one where an ass speaks to a person out on a road? You get the picture.  How am I suppose to understand these things that happened so long ago?

As I carefully pick my steps this evening on my chilly stroll, I am focusing on "hearing".  My ears are hearing the spoken words coming through the tangle of white wires attached to my ears, but am I really "listening"? As usual, I feel like I am hearing rocks in a rock tumbler.  In the flicker of time that it takes for a snake's tongue to taste the air, I "hear" and understand what is being transmitted through the wires.  It is as if someone has taken my ears off "mute" and there is a voice coming through loud and clear.  I can not shake the reality of this hearing.  It sticks to my consciousness the way honey sticks to the spoon.  

We often hear about "covenants".  Maybe you've even made a covenant with someone.  Maybe you've kept it or maybe your good intentions just didn't work out.  God made a covenant with Abram and this covenant is for me too.  In Genesis, He told him to bring a heifer, goat, ram, turtledove, and a pigeon; kill them; cut them down the middle and lay the halves side by side. (Honestly, a pretty gross visual and I am glad He did not ask me to do this!  Yuck! ) In Abram's time, there were several types of covenants, but the most binding was of blood and it was formalized by the both parties passing between the divided halves of the sacrificed animals. When God told Abram to sacrifice those animals and lay their halves side by side, God alone passed between them.  Thus, it is God alone who keeps this covenant.  We contribute nothing to our salvation.  The keeping of this covenant with us is completely dependent on God.  The only thing we have to offer is our trust.

Twenty four hours has passed and still the message is stuck inside of my head like a fly stuck to fly paper.  I can not shake it. I can not cancel this covenant.  I have no rights to this covenant. It is offered to me freely.  

Tonight, I wish we were sitting across from each other in a coffee shop. Tonight, I would look you in the eyes and dare you to really "see".  Tonight, I would gently encourage you to silence your inner noise and really "hear" what our Abba is saying. Ask Him to allow your ears to be open and your eyes to really see.  You might be surprised at what He has for you.  

Until we Chat Again,
The Plank-Eyed Girl 

Burnt Grilled Cheese, Fawns, and Five Smooth Stones

Tentatively, I stood and turned to face the group of five.  Like an awkward fawn, standing for the first time.  Not sure what was happening in my head and heart, I froze.  Realizing my saliva was absent from my mouth, I swallowed hard trying to activate the liquid glands.  Words were absent. My eyes laser-locked on theirs, searching for any sign to continue. My hands nervously clenched against my rib cage.  Stoically, words tumbling from my mouth.  

Painfully, moments lapsed into minutes as this "inspirational" message was delivered.  Truth be told, it was delivered more like a eulogy.

My delivery was worse than burnt grilled cheese on white bread. As this "rehearsal" came to a close, I quickly stuffed my array of papers into my hot pink messenger bag and bolted for the car. 

Zipping along the boulevard, with my heart peppering my mind, I feebly attempted to make sense of the last hour and a half.  What had happened?   This should've been a walk in the park.  I give "inspirational" messages as well as tell stories all day long.  I have a wonderful job doing this for a living. Why did I freeze?  WHAT was going on?  I felt (and I am sure looked) like I was back in seventh grade and this was the first time I had spoken to an audience.

Safely arriving home, I retreat to my bathroom. Dropping clothes onto the floor, I slide into a hot shower and allow the emotion of the train wreck to wash over me.  Moments slip into minutes that are lost.  The hot water expires so I relent and shut it off. All I want is the safety of my memory foam mattress and my childhood pink polk-a-dotted blanket to cocoon in. Thankfully, sleep is waiting for me.  

Morning arrives too soon.  Furrowing into the bedsheets, I refuse to welcome the day.  I hear Abba calling my name.  He whispers, "Go look at David and Goliath."  Ugh!  I KNOW the story of David and Goliath.  I commence to protest, but He is silent.  Evidently, this is a non-negotiable point this morning.  Reaching out of my cocoon, my hand recognizes my bible and I draw it under the covers. Opening it to First Samuel 17.  Dutifully, I read through it. Suddenly verses 38-40 leap off the page.  Awe MAN!  You would think that at 52, I would've learned this by now!   

King Saul tried to give David his own armor and weapons to fight Goliath.  I just tried to deliver an inspirational message according to someone else's formula.  I should know that this NEVER works! David proclaimed, "I can't go in these, I'm not used to them."  He tried on Saul's armor.  Why did I try to use a formula that I was not used to? Next, he strapped on Saul's sword, only to realize that this entire outfit was NOT going to work. Promptly, David took it off and proceeded to pick up the weapons that he was used to (smooth stones).

David did not allow even King Saul to persuade him differently. WOWZEE!!!!     It is in this moment that I realize in my human desire to "please" someone else, I failed miserably at what I have been gifted to do.  Gently my Father whisper, "I have prepared you for this. Trust me."  

YOU have been uniquely designed with gifts and talents that can impact the world.  May you embrace the uniqueness of these gifts and be true to the training He has provided for you.  You can trust His plan and His ways.  

Until We Chat Again,

The Plank-Eyed Girl 

Florescent Orange, Papaya Yellow, and Spots

Excitement coursed through every fiber of my body as I realized I was waking up in my own bed. I had not slept in my bed for over 50 nights.  Plus, today I was to get my hair cut and re-spotted.  

Bounding from my bed, my feet sunk into the sweet succulent cream carpet.  It caused me to pause slightly and really take in my new reality.  I was not on an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, instead I was in Washington and EVERYTHING was different.  Wow! 

Continuing to my closet, I was completely taken with how many clothes I had to choose from.  (I have lived with only a few clothing options for the summer and was totally fine with it.)  Standing there, I felt like a queen!  So many fun and colorful types of clothes and shoes.  Truth be told, I almost put on my hot pink combat boots with my shorts today, but decided that it might be a little much for our small, northwest community. Anyway, I slid into the same denim shorts I had spent most of the summer in; grabbed a shirt from the closet;  found my flip flops; and was on my way.

The feel of sliding into the drivers seat of my little black thing and starting the ignition after not driving for the summer is extremely exhilarating for my being!  I couldn't help but grin as I zipped down the boulevard; around the bay and into the sleepy town of Silverdale.  

Arriving at the salon, I settled into the stylist's chair and celebrated the odd comfort of the familiarity. My "short" hair was long for me and I could hardly wait to have it re-spotted and buzzed.  The stylist proceeded to pull my dried out, wiry hair through the cap and apply the bleach.  The process seemed to be going along normally.  She moved me to the dryer and heated it up.  As I sat there, I lost track of time.  My eyes were heavy.  Sleep wrapped itself around me and I welcomed it.  Being in that sleep like state, I was only vaguely aware of the stylist, checking my locks several times.  I was oddly in a mild state of euphoria.   

Not aware of how much time had passed or how many times she had checked my head, I found myself suddenly in the focal point of a flurry of activity in which the entire salon was involved. Evidently, 45 minutes had gone by and my hair was, well...shall we say....having difficulty accepting the bleach.  In fact, it had turned florescent orange.  On my first glimpse of it,I started laughing hysterically.  You see, I don't think it would be that bad to go back to school with florescent orange hair.  The kids would LOVE it and it would just confirm to the staff that I truly was a spotted-zebra.  

The stylist was now rapidly applying a variety of products to my hair. Additionally, all of her "salon buddies" were trying to give her advice.  It was quite comical.  Just a side note, she had done my hair for over ten years and is an amazing stylist. Anyway, she finally got it toned down to a papaya yellow.  Completely perplexed, she kept saying, "I did EVERYTHING like I always do.  I don't know what is wrong."   

As I was sitting there watching all the drama and pondering the situation, I dawned on me that yesterday morning, while still on the Big Island, I didn't have any shampoo, so I used the antibacterial liquid hand soap.  Now, you need to know that I am a very low maintenance plank-eyed  girl. It didn't even cross my mind that I should mention this to her BEFORE she started my hair appointment.  Meekly, I barely whispered, "Do you think that antibacterial liquid hand soap could cause this?"   Instantly, a stillness overtook the room. Every eye seemed to turn at once toward me.  Suddenly, I couldn't contain my giggles and I just exploded in laughter.  I couldn't believe how serious everyone was.  I proclaimed, "Oh my, it is ONLY hair!"  Laughter erupted and as a wave of relief washed over that salon.  

Thank goodness for google.  After searching several sites, a solution was produced and my hair adventure was finished up.  She cut it nice a short, shaved the back so that my spots showed and breathed a sigh of relief.  

Several times this afternoon, as I have snickered and pondered this epic hair episode.  I have thought about how I, as a daughter of the creator of the Universe, am covered with a protective layer of His warm and fabulous love.    It was a free gift to me on the day I handed over my sins and He placed them on Jesus.  It is a coating that no man can remove.  The best part is that nothing can stick to it. It is transparent, just like the "stuff" in the antibacterial liquid hand soap, but it changes EVERYTHING!  My hair was changed by the coating of something in the antibacterial soap.  My heart was changed by the gift of God's love.  An amazing, completely undeserved gift for this plank-eyed girl who doesn't deserve a magnificent gift such as this.

Careful what you wash in today, it could change everything.

Until we chat again,
The Plank-Eyed Girl

Earth-Pod Girl

24 hours has never seemed like a long time to me, but yesterday it was.  Yesterday, I was cranky, discouraged, and frustrated.  Really not a good combination for anyone.  Honestly, I didn't really have any reason to feel this way.  I was telling myself to snap out of it.  I was explaining to my head that I had the gift of life, shelter, food, clothing, etc., but my heart was just not listening to my head.  I hate that when it happens.  It was just a storm in my heart that seemed to be raging.  I am glad that most of the time I don't deal with this kind of thing.  

I managed to get myself to work.  I even managed to get myself to worship.  (Where I am currently working on the Big Island, we have a fabulous all campus worship time on Monday morning.)  As worship drew to a close, I was completely unaware of the delightful surprise that awaited me in the next few moments.  As worship was nearing the end, I slide my feet into cushy flip-flops and proceeded to saunter back towards the kitchen.  That is when I encountered her again.  Earth-Pod Girl.  I had met her on Saturday.  In fact, we had even sat in a volcanic formed tide pool for over an hour and she spoke of her past; her passions; her heartbreak; and her desire for more of God.  I was enthralled with this amazing girl's story.  She was smart, plucky, fun, and wounded.  You see, we share a passion for using the world's trash in reusable ways to help the poor.  In particular, she wants to use recycled trash to build "earth-pod"  structures for the poor of the world to live in.  As we had parted our ways on Saturday, I wondered if I would have an opportunity to chat with her again.  Little did I know what God had in store.  

On this morning, as I departed the Ohana Court, Earth-Pod girl planted herself in front of me.  With a silly grin on her face and a floppy straw hat on her head, she said, "I want to encourage you this morning.  Can I pray for you?"  I just looked at her and heard myself say, "Sure."  Sometimes I am amazed at myself and just how detached I am.  Anyway, she started praying.  Well...really she was proclaiming what she was seeing in her heart and what the Lord was whispering to her ears.  She spoke in fragments, pausing as if listening for the next bit of words.  Each fragment she spoke pierced my heart and deflated the discouragement that had implanted itself and taken over.  Her words chased the crankiness out of the chambers where it had lodged and taken root.  Mostly though, her words took the pieces of my frustration and seemed to rearrange them in a way that let me get a glimpse of where the Lord and I are journeying.  

Thank you Earth-Pod girl for helping this Plank-Eyed Girl.

Enjoy the gift of today.  You never know when God will place someone in front of you.

Until we chat again,

Plank-Eyed Girl

A Symphony of Indelible Words

Words!  

The day started with a familiar whispered voice floating slowly to my one exposed ear, "Do you know what today is?"  As my consciousness raced to catch up with what my ear was hearing, the information suddenly all fell into its proper place and I realized that today I would celebrate my 18,615th trip around the sun!  As I lay all snuggled up on my bed, a smirk slowly crept across my face. WOW!!!!  That I have been given the gift of so many days!  All I could think was, "THIS day is going to be  completely delicousful!"

Quickly dressing, my Mr. placed a card and box in my hands.  I cradled the box for a few moments and pondered the possibilities of what treasure I was about to discover.  True to my childish form, I opened the box first.  Moments later, my neck was adorned with the most beautiful sterling silver and opal Honu necklace.  Truly a gift of love.  However, even better than that were the words that were so carefully penned in the card.  Words of affirmation.  Words of encouragement.  Words of devotion and love.  

My morning and afternoon were continually sprinkled with kind texts; sweet instant messages; and thoughtfully written cards.  All of these words made my heart full.   Little did I know though that the next few hours would totally rock my world. As my shift, in the kitchen ended, we gathered in a circle to chat with the Lord . After our general end of shift prayer, one of my kitchen girlies bellowed out, "It's her birthday!  Let's pray for her!"  In an instant, I found myself being gentled nudged into the center and completely encased with many arms hugging me and a vast variety of beautiful eyes looking eagerly into mine.  Two weeks ago, these kids were completely unknown to me and today, they are precious treasures. It seemed like in that moment, time froze.  When I realized they had transitioned and were talking to our Father on my behalf, I was undone.  The symphony of their words spoken in Portuguese,  Korean, Dutch, Spanish, English, Swedish, German, and a few other languages, swirled and danced over me as they made their way up to my Father's ears.  What a gift! This moment will be FOREVER etched in my heart!  I believe in that moment, I got to hear a bit of what my Father hears all the time as believer's from all over this planet speak with Him.  It is a stunningly beautiful chorus.  It is a chorus rich in the harmony of all languages, woven into a continual song.  From this moment forward, I will hold this chorus in my mind and savor it every day of my life until I change locations.  It is truly an unforgettable splendiferous sound. 

If nothing else had happened today, it would have been one of the best birthdays ever.  However, little did I know, there was another wonderful gift waiting for me when I returned to our residence. My Mr. informed me that the leadership team wanted to gather and celebrate.  To be honest, I was a titch hesitant.  I was tired and sticky from a day in the kitchen. Plus, believe it or not, I don't really like to be the center of attention.  However, not wanting to be rude, I quickly cleaned myself up and we headed over.  Little did I know that I was about to receive another indelible gift.  As I entered, I realized we were all being invited to sit in a circle.  I wasn't sure what to think.  Was this just a social visit? Was there going to be some kind of meeting.  I could feel my uncertainty rising up from deep inside.  I always get a little afraid when this happens and truth be told, I want to withdraw, run away, or cocoon.  Doing a great deal of "self-talk," I managed to sit still and stay put. One of the leaders sat down next to me.  For the next 20ish minutes, each person on this team shared from their heartfelt, sincere, and wonderfully affirming words. Oh yeah, one more thing, they served me utterly scrumptious cheesecake!  (It was my favorite from the Cheesecake Factory.)  As I sauntered back to my room, my heart was dancing and twirling.  

As I have pondered the many indelible moments of this day, I realize that they are all woven together with a delicate thread.  This thread is an essential element of our existence.  As humans, we have an innate need to communicate with each other and therefore we use words to do this.  Words can be either verbal or non-verbal, but nevertheless, words are essential to our ability to function on this planet. Words are what bring me both joy and sorrow.  They have the ability to inflate my soul or to deflate my heart.  Words are a precious commodity that I have been given the ability to use. At the moment, I have the opportunity to use my words to share my thoughts and heart with you. Thank you for listening with your ears and hearing with your heart.  May my words bring life to your dry soul.  May you know just how precious your words are to those you come in contact with today.  May you also know that the one who made you has words of life that will inflate your soul and bring hope.  Why not open the Word and let it pour life into you.

Until we exchange "words" again,

The Plank-Eyed Girl